It's now been exactly 3 weeks since I touched down at home again and to be honest in such a short space of time quite a bit has gone on, it has made it seem as though I have been home for so much longer. I decided to do this post because settling back into home, life and just reality in general was literally such a difficult few weeks for me. My blog and my social media across all platforms is always quite positive and in fact I get quite a lot of messages from people complimenting my positivity and ability to always remain happy. Which is always a lovely message to receive but I think it is important for me to share this post because life is not always perfect for anyone, however people, including me only ever post the perfection. Nobody ever shares their worst day online, thus leading to SO many people, including myself feeling bet down by "how amazing" other people's lives are on social media.
On occasions, I often get into quite a funk. It can last a few days or sometimes a couple of weeks but this year I feel as though I truly taught myself the correct way of coming out of it. Which in my opinion is key to avoiding it becoming a serious mental health issue.
Prior to this year I think my way of coping with negative feelings or situations would always end up in me engaging in some form of self destructive behaviour. To be honest I think without realising it most people actually do the same, for example how many times after a bad thing happens do we feel going out and getting drunk is the best solution? Then we have fun for a few hours and the next day we feel even worse than the day before.
Coming home from anywhere is always difficult whether you've been away for 2 days, 2 months like me or even 2 years. Hence the term "holiday blues" exists. When I came home from travelling I sunk into one of the worst funks I have had in a very long time and it lasted the guts of almost two weeks. I cried so many times, there were days when I couldn't even get dressed because I genuinely couldn't see the point at all and I completely restricted my food because my eating disordered thoughts always find away of convincing me that losing weight will make everything better, it never does.
BUT... Three weeks on from being home I am now feeling happy and hopeful and genuinely excited about the future as well as the now! So I decided to share my ways of getting out of my worst funks because its not the bad times that are significant its overcoming them which really matter.
Recognise how you're feeling...
I feel like this may sound a little bit dumb because most people might think you just always know how you feel but what I mean by this is to really try and recognise each emotion and try to make sense of why you're feeling that way so you can try to come up with a suitable way to overcome it. For example, when I came home I had no job, no money and not a lot to do as I had a full month before returning to college. I felt completely hopeless and began panicking and stressing. So I began trying to notice each emotion and why I was feeling it and came up with a solution and a goal/plan to overcome each one. For example money - I applied for jobs online and worked on getting my old job back which I'm returning to soon and I have managed to get a bit of work doing promotions on the side. I sold some clothes on depop and I set myself goals in relations to money and work. Doing all of this is important because it creates light at the end of the tunnel and allows you to escape the negative thoughts which to be honest is one of the biggest factors in escaping a funk at all. As I've mentioned before I am a strong believer in the law of attraction!
Meditation...
This relates to the previous paragraph as I feel recognising emotions and dealing with them in a calm way is not something which is always easy nor something that is natural for people. I started taking meditation seriously at the start of this year when my eating disorder started to take over again slightly and I was in quite a funk for a few months. Now I try to practice it at least 3 times a week and I don't go to sleep without a sleep meditation playing in the background. Meditation is time where you're thinking in the now, not the future or the past. It allows you to really just be in the present moment without thoughts racing around you're mind. By practicing it on a regular basis, being in touch with yourself and your feelings and emotions becomes much easier and clearer. I've also began a little bit of self education on the chakras and tried meditations which heal each chakra and I've without doubt noticed an improvement in myself on a day to day basis.
A question I get a lot when I discuss meditation with people is "how do you do it? I can't just sit there for 10 - 20 minutes". I'll be first to admit it takes time to be able to fully feel the benefit, especially if like me you find it difficult to sit still for anything ever. But by consistently practicing you will eventually look forward to it. Once you feel the benefits you'll never look back!
A question I get a lot when I discuss meditation with people is "how do you do it? I can't just sit there for 10 - 20 minutes". I'll be first to admit it takes time to be able to fully feel the benefit, especially if like me you find it difficult to sit still for anything ever. But by consistently practicing you will eventually look forward to it. Once you feel the benefits you'll never look back!
Keep Yourself Occupied...
This one is quite a big one for me because when I am not kept busy I start to lose my mind and feel like I have no purpose. So when I came home and had no clue when I would be busy again I was totally stressed about it and got quite down. So I decided to throw myself into my blog as well as editing pictures and videos from the trip and electric picnic. I also threw myself into getting work organised as well as meeting up with friends who I hadn't seen since before I had left. One thing I quite enjoy too is exercise whether it is just an hour of yoga in my sitting room or going to the gym or for a run, I always feel better afterwards with a much clearer mind.
Another thing I threw myself into was self educating myself a little on spirituality, meditation, chakras, the moon and Buddhism as they were all things I had a slight interest in after spending time in Asia and seeing temples etc. You can learn so much from the internet and I am so glad I started to research it all because without it even being my intention a lot of the information I was teaching myself was so healing to my negative thoughts.
Find something which you enjoy and use it as a way to escape and heal your negative thoughts.
Find something which you enjoy and use it as a way to escape and heal your negative thoughts.
Eat, Sleep, Heal...
Getting the right foods and getting enough sleep is a mega point here. Sometimes in a funk I'll comfort eat to feel better and always feel worse or on other occasions I will completely restrict which leaves me with absolutely no energy to do anything productive. My main goal when I am coming out of a funk is to make sure I am eating enough of whole, healthy foods to fuel my body and keep me healthy. Sleep is another big one, whenever I am stressed I find it really hard to sleep and when I am quite down I can oversleep for way to long. As I mentioned above I always use a sleep meditation, most of which I listen to on youtube. They work so well for me 9 times out of 10 and your subconscious is always listening so they are very healing as well as helping your sleep.
Give yourself a detox from things like alcohol, fast foods and late nights during your bad times, a healthy body makes a healthy mind!
Give yourself a detox from things like alcohol, fast foods and late nights during your bad times, a healthy body makes a healthy mind!
Show Yourself Some Love...
I have touched on self love on my blog before but I will never leave it out of a post like this because I cannot stress its importance. Having struggled quite a bit recently with my food and my body image, self love during this funk was something I practically had to force myself to do. For me self love is small things from putting on make up or doing a facemask or putting on tan. I keep trying to focus on the things I like about myself as opposed to the things I don't. Again, the law of attraction comes into play here, if you treat yourself kind the world will follow. I think a big thing to revisit here which I touched on slightly at the start of this post is comparison. Comparison KILLZ! How many times after looking at your fave instagram gal have you critiqued yourself and put yourself down? Personally I am so guilty for this and for what? As I said people only ever post the best version of themselves online, with the best lighting, the best angle and the picture you see on their instagram probably came after a number of pictures they weren't happy with before the winning shot! In reality the people we compare ourselves to are comparing themselves to other people, so what is the point? Love Yoself!
Appreciate Your Surroundings...
By this I mean two things, the first being get in touch with what it is around you and make the most of it. For me I live beside the beach and a park which are both amazing places to go and clear the mind even on a rainy day. The second thing I mean by this is the majority of times your problem is a fraction of somebody else's in the worlds at the same time. Especially right now with so many natural disasters literally wiping peoples lives away. I always try to remind and ask myself if what's causing me to be so down will still be an issue for me in the coming months and almost always the answer is no, so what is the point in letting it tear me apart creating even more issues.
Once you start to open your eyes to what is around you, you realise how lucky you really are. For me it's always the simple things that do this for me, I have a house, an incredibly supportive family, amazing friends, an education, my health and I could list so much more!!!
Getting My Wardrobe Back!
Towards the last few weeks of my travels one of the main things I was looking forward to getting back to was my clothes! My backpack began to offer less and less as the weeks went by! And if there is one thing that can always cheer me up it is clothes! So since coming back I've been having some fun styling some cute looks!
Here is a few...
Jeans - H&M
Belt - Asos
White gilet shirt - Asos
Top - Topshop
Fishnet Crop - H&M (DIY JOB)
Earrings - Penneys
Hat - Nine Crows
I loved this casual look and it was perfect for the weather because it wasn't too hot or too cold which is perfect for the constant indecisive Irish September! All of the pieces are from previous years, I did a little DIY job on the fishnet top and cropped it because I am loving the cropped style making an appearance everywhere at the mo! I wore a little pleather jacket with this outfit when I went out to keep warm!
Fishnet Crop - Fresh Temple Bar
Pleather Top - Misguided
Jeans - Nine Crows
Sandals - H&M
I am bringing half my Spring/Summer wardrobe into Autumn/Winter with a whole load of layers! This is one reason I adoreeee the cropped style taking over street style at the moment! I've been having so much fun layering loads of different little crops and tops and then adding big jackets or coats! It's a layer but you don't have to hide your cute outfit and you can wear your pieces from summer in winter styled completely differently!
'
Top - H&M
Pants - Charity Shop
Hat - eBay
Woop I have finally jumped on board the beret trend and I am loving it! I got mine on eBay for super cheap! I think after shipping it totalled at about €9 which in comparison to the outrageous prices some high street stores are charging is pretty good! I am so excited to get a few more to style up my looks for Autumn/Winter!!! I have been trying to only wash my hair once or twice a week to try and get it healthier a long with avoiding bleach and colour, so my hair is a huge fan of hats being a massive trend this A/W, no roots on show! Lol!
I wore this look for my sisters debs, she looked like an absolute princess
If you're still reading to here, thank you! I know this post is a long one and I probably lost a lot of people on the way but I just really wanted to share how I cope with the bad times because as I said at the start of this post nobody ever shares their worst day or their worst outfit or the day they're bloated AF online! We only ever see people at their best and it is so important to always remind yourself of this before you run and compare yourself, your life or your appearance to anybody else's online.
If you yourself aren't in a great place right now always remember you can get through it and if you haven't reached a point where you're confident in doing it on yourself, ALWAYS reach out. Speak to people and ask for support, you deserve it.
You are what matters, focus on you!
Having come out of this funk I finally feel so grateful for the opportunities the universe has thrown my way so far this year and look forward to what is to come! I am going back to college in the next few days, it is my final year & I cannot believe how fast it has come. My aim now is to do my best within the academic year inside of college and outside. I have set myself some goals and come up with some exciting projects which I am really excited to get working on! I am excited to plan some more trips as well as doing some fun things at home!
One of the benefits to a funk is I always come out stronger and having learnt more about myself as a person!
Grainne
XO
